Friday, November 20, 2009

For ffffashion's sake!

Why do girls who consider themselves oh-so-fashionable insist on wearing hideous, and outrageously expensive, dresses that don’t flatter them?

I’m positive that certain shops put hallucinogenic in the air vents above the changing room mirrors, otherwise, these women are purposely cladding themselves in unsuitable clothing just for the sake of being “fashionable”.

You know how you see things on the catwalk and say, “yeah, but that would only ever look good on a size 6.” Well it seems that larger trend followers run to the shops to purchase these items, clearly ignoring those limitations.

One of the worst offending outfits of the 2000s was the bubble skirt. For some reason hoards of larger fashion followers seemed to run to the shops to purchase these, without taking fit and figure into account. My advise on these pieces is - if your bubble is over a butt only Sir Mix-A-Lot can appreciate, don't go there. Let the models have these ones!

Now I’m not saying all catwalk fashion is exclusive to the physically-blessed smaller ladies. I’m talking about wearing clothes that actually suit your figure, rather than just buying something because it's a Karen Walker or comes from World or Ricochet.

So many times I’ve heard, “omg, I got this fab dress from [insert overly-expensive design store here] and it cost me like $300!” Careful thinking is required before making a response. How can you say to your friends, “wow, you just spent $300 on something unflattering and awkward, I bought this dress for $60 from [favourite generic store] and it does wonders for me!”

You don’t have to spend big bucks to look good. Specialty items from design stores are amazing to have, but the truth is, you can’t wear them every day and more often than not, they don’t actually look good on regular people.

Is there something about larger ladies that makes them think, “if I can’t be a size 6, at least I’ll be at the cutting edge of fashion, whether it suits me or not.”

It’s like a suicidal defiance for susceptible fashion victims.

ps. I tried to find some images to support the article but "unflattering clothing" isn't a search that pops up too many hits - imean, who wants that label on their clothing? Hilariously, the image that kept coming up was of Jessica Simpson when she got a bit of the chub on and wore that high-waisted jeans + many belts number. poor thing.

pps. I have nothing against any of the design stores mentioned - they make beautiful clothing - it's just not for everyone. I'd probably shop there if I could afford it, given that I'm borderline acceptably skinny to suit the clothes!

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